When We Focus On Revenge Instead Of Healing We Never Heal
Recently, a friend of mine has been on a revenge mission after he was hurt by his girlfriend. Wait a minute!!! His girlfriend cheated on him two weeks after the proposal. Not with one but two men. I have been helping my friend find “the best” way of revenge until I found out how revenge works.
Ever been wronged by someone in a way that you still remember to date? It does not matter if it is yesterday or ten years ago? By being hurt or wronged this leads to the thought of inflicting hurt or harm on someone for an injury or wrong done to oneself. This is how we define revenge.
We often believe that exacting revenge is a form of emotional release and that getting retribution will help us feel better. Probably we have watched some movies that portray revenge but how does it end? It creates only a cycle of retaliation.
Revenge is a normal reaction when you or someone you love has been viciously attacked, their dignity as well as their lives stripped from them. This feeling has for a long time and again been armored by media.
How can we avoid revenge?
Let Karma Work!
Always remember what the bible says in
1 Peter 3:9 Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult. On the contrary, repay evil with blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing.
This also reminds us that God is the ultimate judge and when we seek revenge, we are taking His place. karma is watching everything, eventually, everyone will get their reward.
Focus on your own-self
When someone brings you down, they are already below you. Do not stoop to meet them. Spend your energies on nourishing your own self-worth. In this way, you spend time looking after you and not chasing after them.
Seek help from elders or from more mature friends
An example of this is seeking relationship guidance from people who have been married and been together for a long time in case of a cheating partner. People who have experienced much of such experiences will share with you and advise you accordingly.
Be strong and forgive, be smart, and ignore the existence of those that wronged you. The weak person can never forgive, forgiveness is a sign of strength because forgiveness does not change the past but it does enlarge the future. Forgive everyone not to make them free but for your satisfaction to move on.